The origin story
Every Great Holiday Needs an Origin Story
Kennfestivus began with a simple observation: for 88 days every year, Kenn is two years younger than Sarah.
What is Kennfestivus?
Kennfestivus is an annual celebration of one of life's most important temporary technicalities.
Kenn and Sarah are normally one year apart in age. Every year, Sarah's birthday on September 13 opens a remarkable season that runs through December 10. Kenn's birthday on December 11 closes the season. For those 88 glorious days, Kenn is officially two years younger.
Most people would simply notice this and move on. Kenn created a holiday.
Kennfestivus is personal. It is unnecessary. It is completely official, at least according to Kenn.
Sarah Makes Opening Day Possible
Kennfestivus begins with Sarah. Her September 13 birthday creates the temporary two-year age difference, so the first official act of every season is to celebrate Sarah and acknowledge her contribution to the calendar.
Only after Sarah has been properly honored may Kenn begin making unreasonable use of his temporary age advantage.
First, celebrate Sarah. Then, commence Kennfestivus.
Before It Was Kennfestivus
The holiday itself reaches back decades. Long before it had a crest, a website, or even a settled name, the annual age difference was already recognized and celebrated within the family.
In those earlier years it was known simply as "the two-year gap" or, in Kenn's more teasing vocabulary, "the 'my old lady' period." The calendar technicality, the jokes, and the annual observance all came before the official identity.
The Name and the Shirt
The name Kennfestivus appears to have emerged in the year or so before 2020. The precise naming date is not documented, but by September 13, 2020, both Kenn and Sarah were using it publicly.
That season also produced the first official Kennfestivus T-shirt. The shirt gave the newer name something visible and repeatable, and the holiday finally gained lasting footing.
The two-year gap came first. The name followed. The shirt made it official.
The Surviving Historical Record
Opening Day posts from September 13, 2020 identify Sarah's birthday as the beginning of the season, use the Kennfestivus name, and show the first official shirt. A December record from that year also identifies the culmination night.
The record continues with an opening proclamation and the matching of the socks in 2021, public discussion of the 89-day arithmetic and tagline in 2022, and increasingly visible shirts, signs, portraits, closing celebrations, and Kennfestivus Decades observances from 2023 through 2025.
Accordingly, 2020 is the earliest documented named Kennfestivus and the year it gained official footing. It is not the beginning of the underlying holiday.
Why 88 days?
Because 88 became the official count. Sarah's birthday opens Kennfestivus on September 13, the celebration runs through December 10, and Kenn's birthday on December 11 returns the age gap to normal.
The Open Secret of the 89th Day
The traditional account says Kennfestivus was confidently proclaimed as an 88-day observance for years before anyone checked the arithmetic. The surviving record makes the story even better: one 2020 Opening Day post says 89 days, while another from the same day preserves the official 88-day description. Sarah again called it 89 days in 2022.
September 13 through December 10 does contain 89 calendar days. The arithmetic was an open secret, but 88 had already become the identity of the holiday. The official ruling therefore remains unchanged: December 10, the 89th calendar day, is observed as an extension of Day 88.
On the 89th day, we extend the 88th.
How the holiday developed
- 01
The two-year gap
For decades, the annual age difference is observed as family lore without a formal name.
- 02
The name
Around the year before 2020, the two-year gap becomes Kennfestivus.
- 03
The first official shirt
In 2020, the shirt gives the name visibility, permanence, and its first real footing.
- 04
The customs
Proclamations, portraits, apparel, signs, and the matching of the socks become part of the surviving record.
- 05
Kennfestivus Decades
The 2024 and 2025 records preserve the especially consequential contrast between Kenn's 40s and Sarah's 50s.
- 06
The official ruling
The 89th calendar day is formally absorbed into Day 88, protecting the number that defines the observance.
- 07
The platform
The observance receives its own crest, archives, countdown, traditions, and place on the internet.
What are Kennfestivus Decades?
Kennfestivus Decades, always plural, are special celebrations held every eight years. They mark years when the age-decade contrast deserves extra ceremony, such as when Kenn remains in his 40s while Sarah is in her 50s. Family posts document this distinction in the 2024 and 2025 celebrations. The Archives record every documented year; Kennfestivus Decades distinguish the especially consequential ones.
Is it a real holiday?
It has a name, a date range, a logo, a website, traditions, and at least one person who takes it very seriously. That meets the required standard.
Is this related to Festivus?
No. There is no pole, no airing of grievances, and no feats of strength. Kennfestivus is an entirely separate annual observance devoted to one temporary age advantage.